saveyourbrain | [TEST] DRIVE IT LIKE YOU STOLE IT

Entry tags:

test drive meme

[TEST] DRIVE IT LIKE YOU STOLE IT

I HONESTLY COULDN'T THINK OF A GOOD PICTURE SO THANKS LAVVY

Here, have the slightly more relevant song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_nLlL1mwKI

Anyway, this is a random scenario test drive meem, since we've had an influx of new potential appers. I am a bit too lazy to make this a proper meem, so you make your own shit up. Here's some inspirational scenarios:

> The Mall. The hell are you doing out in the suburbs, bro? And why is that woman trying so hard to sell you nail polish?
> The Park. MAN IT IS A NICE D-- shit is that a Vermicelli or whatever the monsters are called?
> Arts & Crafts Fair. Cute knit cat cozies! Bad pretzels! YEAH.
> Rainy Day. It's wet and you're stuck at the bus stop. HOW DEGRADING.
> You get an echo while someone else is around. SHIT. PARANOIA TIME.

Or make up your own!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Scenario One]

[It's raining, hard. But it's the kind of rain that somehow manages to be almost completely silent despite the hundreds of structures the thousands of drops continue to assail. Under this rain is a girl with light blue hair and bright red eyes, standing completely still, and unbothered by the darkened 4PM sky. She has no umbrella, and the bus stop she's waiting at is of the "sign" variety rather than the "posh little roofed enclosure" variety leaving her completely drenched. The only sign of actual displeasure at the fact that she's quickly becoming more than 60% water is a quiet, drawn out sigh complimenting by her fingers anxiously tapping the trim of her school bag.

Will she catch a cold? Will someone drive by and splash her with disgusting street runoff? Will a kind stranger offer her to share their umbrella?

Let's find out.]

[Scenario 2]

[The arts and crafts fair is almost over! You can find Rei hurriedly walking through the stands and display booths. There's probably a good chance she's going to bump into you, and there's also probably a good chance that she's going to keep walking without apologizing. The best you may get is a hushed "excuse me" as she lies about the fact that she actually feels remorse that she just ran into you. Really, it happens all the time, why should she? Besides, she's clearly in a hurry. Her eyes are scanning the tables covered in wonderful examples of human handiwork like a heat seeking missile seeking its target.]

Nothing here... [The girl mutters quietly to herself, making another sharp turn through the groups of people, trying to get a look at as many stands as she can as quickly as she can.]

[Guess who also doesn't have an umbrella?! Your brother, what a shock. He approaches from behind.]

You too, huh?

[When you live in the same house as someone for 14 years you get a feel for the way their footsteps sound. She knows it's him, so her expression doesn't change much as she greets him with a nod.]

I missed the first bus. I thought you'd already be on your way home. [Sniffling slightly, she takes a step towards him and furrows her brow. ]

You're going to catch a cold.

I got caught up in some stuff...

[He sighs, folding his arms across his chest.]

You're worse off than I am, from the sound of it.

Edited 2013-06-25 09:08 (UTC)

Which is why I don't need to be as concerned since I already have one. You're the one in danger here. [And she can't allow Shinji to get sick. Because that would mean he wouldn't be able to do the housework or cook. Which would lead to Rei making dinner. Which would probably lead to Shinji's condition getting much worse. A vicious cycle.

She holds out her palm in front of his chest.]

Wallet.

[He'd still insist on cooking if only to escape Rei's food.]

Why?

[Better safe than sorry. She reaches her other hand into her skirt pocket and pulls out her cellphone, switching it to a text message that reads the next buses as 24 and 30 minutes away due to delays. Rei presents this message to Shinji.]

You're not going to stay in the rain without an umbrella for that long. [Pointing across the street to a convenience store, she tugs on his sleeve.]

We can buy one if you have the money. [Another tug.]

Make with the cash, Shinji.

[DEFEATED SIGH.]

Okay, I'm going...

[Mumble mumble.]

If you're the one that wants an umbrella, why does it have to be my money...

If I already had the money, do you think I'd be standing in the rain without one?

The school had a few neat references books on sale at the book sale, and I didn't anticipate this weather. [And that why her bag is sinking a lot lower than it usually does. She gives a subtle "what do you want from me?" look.]

Sorry. [She doesn't sound sorry.]

[HUFF. He goes into the store and buys an umbrella without replying.

And when he returns, he has a nice umbrella over his head, and holds it out to cover both of them as he stops next to her.]

Here.

[She flashes a small smile as the rain finally stops pelting her.]

Thanks Shinji. [Reaches out and pats the side of his face. Good boy. This gesture isn't nearly as facetious as it probably looks. Honest.]

I'll pay you back by helping with the laundry. [Glances towards their clothes.]

It's looking...necessary.

Edited 2013-06-25 10:01 (UTC)

You should help with the laundry anyway!

[Why does he have to do all the chores?! Lazy slob.]

[The smile turns a bit sheepish.]

Okay, okay...

What was it again...Reds and whites always have to go together, right?

[A disgusted sigh.]

No one's going to believe you're that stupid, you know.

[...Drat. She shouldn't have expected the feigned ignorance to work more than once.]

...I don't know, Shinji. Remember when you trusted me with dinner? [Do you remember, Shinji? Rei Ikari's famous "strange gray paste platter"]

I'm trying to block that memory from my mind.

[Sigh.]

Fine, fine...

[Rei stands silently for a moment. Honestly, she does feel kind of bad that Shinji is always stuck with the chores while she makes sure no one is claiming that Benedict Arnold sent a beacon into outer space signaling for the eventual destruction of the planet earth.

Eventually, she looks over at him.]

Your next paper.

Sound good?

Edited 2013-06-25 10:32 (UTC)

[Thinking it over...]

Alright.

What would you like for dinner, anyway?

Soup is the optimal foodstuff when it comes to dealing with colds, isn't it?

Assuming we have some, I wouldn't mind some of the simple stuff, if you're okay with that.

[Wrinkles her nose uncomfortably.]

Besides, you shouldn't waste any of our good food on my clogged sinuses...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[TEST] DRIVE IT LIKE YOU STOLE IT

Rei Ayanami | Neon Genesis Evangelion

REIN...I mean rain.

THE REI PUNS DONT STOP

THEY REIGN SUPREME

omfg yes. they're like a pleasant rei of sunshine

I would prefer a reinbow

these puns are getting terrible i may have to ereise them

you've gone too far.

gingey sometimes you have to reise the stakes

someone needs to reiscue me from these puns

wait i forgot the rei pun. uh. reisins. ok good.

weaaaaaaaaaaak

:|

don't :| me mister

excuse me for getting.......ireite :3

I'm gonna kill you

smooches

gross don't do that in public

fine jeez!!!!