Test Drive Meme

[scramasax]

HEL-LO, EARTH'S NEW HEROES.

Test Drive Meme!

Scenarios:

> Cleanup of downtown Locke City still has a ways to go. It looks like that shop you were planning on another trip to this week is closed for the time being. Or the entire block is trashed and you'll be needing an alternate route to work. Or your workplace is trashed, if not some real estate you had in the area, and you'll be needing a helping hand - or are trying to offer one!
> Help, help, I've been robbed - your bag or wallet's just been snatched, or is in the process of being snatched. Catch the snatcher or rough them up - you may or may not be surprised, if you come to blows or a chase, to find on throwing a punch that they're much quicker and/or sturdier than you'd have expected. Maybe someone will dive in to back you up.
> Monster encounter! The above or you were robbed (or, for all you could tell, misplaced something) a while ago, and one of the objects you lost seems to have come back to you, if not the way you recognize it. Ayup, getting backup might be a good idea.
> Transportation/travel. You're at an airport or train station, whether to escape or take a tour to a strange-events hotspot, or plain go on an innocent vacation. Mix up your bags or timetables, grab a pre-ride snack, chat up those with the same destination, get or give directions, find yourself receiving an ill-timed item Echo in front of security - whatever you can think up!
> Say - is that one of those superhumans you've spied on the street? Yes, I do believe it is - you've seen them on the news/read about them, that or their looks give them away! Go on and ask questions of them, be it for serious answers or an autograph, depending on who you are.
> ...And it looks like you're a superhuman yourself. Looks like that hollowed-out feeling you got was followed by a mutation, or some strange thing in your brain. How're you going to come to grips with it?
> Wildcard/Etc. Make up your own!

Prompts suggested by Alec and Zero.

Comments

Michelle Sasaki (Orihime Inoue) | Bleach

[sixpetals]

[help help i've been robbed! ...or not.]

[So, a young girl walking home by herself late in the evening might have seemed like an easy target for a robbery, huh? There was no sign marking her as one of those 'superhumans' that had been floating about on the news and internet, after all, so what could possibly go wrong?

Of course, one does not need to be a superhuman to kick a potential robber right in the crotch, which is the fate that befalls this particular, ill-fortuned pickpocket. Any onlookers might find themselves wondering if they saw correctly, though, considering moments after the man crumples to the ground she's tripping over a crack in the sidewalk and laughing at her own clumsiness, waving off any attempts at concern with a smile and flustered wave of the arm.]

[Wildcard]

[Lord of the Fries is a small, family-owned and operated cafe in downtown Locke known for its mean grilled cheese sandwich and its penchant for ridiculous food puns. In big letters on the overhead chalkboard reads, Lettuce Souprise You With Our Special of The Day, and on the menus there are subheadings such as "The Great Impasta", "Frying Nemo", and "Custard's Last Stand".

Michelle has been working as a waitress there for the past six months or so. It's often drudgery, and the pay is far from ideal, especially for a part-timer like her. Still, with her eighteenth birthday and legal adulthood looming large, she needs to save up the money to get an apartment of her own. The staff is friendly and easy to work with, though, and the patrons' reactions to her 'Franks a lot for coming to Lord of the Fries, my name is Michelle and I'll be your server today' spiel make it almost worthwhile, sometimes, especially since she's one of the few who always manage to say it with a completely straight face, as if it's her first time telling the joke.

...Other patrons, however, certainly do not. A few tables over she can see a middle-aged lady with enough makeup on to choke a cat harassing one of the other waitresses about anything and everything, and when she demands her tea be removed from the check because there were too many teabags put into it, Michelle finally has had enough.

She strides over purposefully with a fresh teapot, as if meaning to appease the woman, but at the last second "trips", spilling the hot liquid all over her clothes.

Enjoy your free tea, bitch.]

"Oh my gosh I'm so sorry!! Aaaah, oh no, I'm so clumsy, I hope your dress isn't ruined....."

[She'll probably get the tea on the house and then some, but the look on her face (and her coworker's) was definitely worth it.]

[shineonyou]

[ Jonas is one of the patrons who thinks the entire cafe is absolutely fucking hilarious. From "Franks a lot" to "A Latte Problems," Jonas has been delighted like a small, babby Linda upon discovering her first Prussian history book. During the first five seconds of sitting, he had already decided that he was going to give his cutieass waitress a ridiculous tip (and maybe his number????), and in all honesty, he's probably given Michelle at least one thumbs up.

Which means when a customer gets sassy, he takes an interest, and when Michelle 'trips,' he's legitimately concerned until he realizes the purpose behind it.

Nice ( at least it's nice because it doesn't seem like the lady is harmed, wow that'd be bad if she decided to sue or something didnt that happen to mcdonalds?!?!! ).

Double thumbs up, gurl. ]

[sixpetals]

[Of course, Michelle tilts her head in bemused fashion when she sees the double thumbs-up. You couldn't possibly be congratulating her for clumsily tripping and ruining a obnoxious piece of shit customer's clothes, could you...? Why would you ever do that, she is ever so sorry for what she did.

So sorry, in fact, that as she shuffles off to get the woman a towel, she punches in the code for a free dessert coupon to Jonas's order, and brings a heaping bowl of orange sherbert to his table just as she's getting up to (huffily) leave.]

Orange you glad this won't be on your bill?

[A wink. See, this is what happens when you're a customer that doesn't suck.

...Well, not usually. But rubbing it in just a little doesn't hurt, right? As they say, revenge is a dish best served cold.]]

[shineonyou]

[ He fucking cackles-- Jonas is, by no means, a subtle guy and if the huffy customer didn't notice Michelle's reward for Jonas' support, she will now.

Mock conspiratorially, he leans in closer to Michelle and near-whispers: ]

You planned this for the pun, didn't you? Right from the start-- "Orange you glad" was the game plan, wasn't it?

[sixpetals]

Planned...? [Her mouth forms a perfect 'o' of confusion, brows furrowing gently.]

Oh! Oh, no, I just came up with it on the way from putting in your coupon...! I love orange puns, haha...

[She twirls a finger around a lock of her red-orange hair, as if to illustrate why she would enjoy orange-themed puns. Look, you know what happened here, and she knows what happened here, but if Huffy Customer brings around a manager, she needs some degree of plausible deniability.]

[shineonyou]

i pressed enter too soon dont look at me

[Robbery]

[aint_that_peachy]

[A young woman who bears a striking resemblance to Princess Peach calmly watches Michelle approach from the alley and enjoys her cigarette, the sight of the guy on the ground, and the girl's seemingly inconsistent sense of balance. When Michelle gets close, she speaks:]

Nice move, kid. It'll take 'im a couple hours to start feelin' anyth'n' else.

[Mel continues smoking and looks Michelle over.]

You wearin' heels 'r some'n'?

[sixpetals]

A-ah! [Immediately she laughs, looking and sounding sheepish.]

No, no, I'm just really really clumsy, I bet if I wore heels, I'd break my ankles or something, hahaha...!

[And she's looking back at the man's crumpled form with a faint frown, brows furrowed just so.]

Oh, I hope I didn't hurt him too bad. [Lies, she hopes that fucker doesn't walk straight for weeks.] It's just, he scared me...

[aint_that_peachy]

[Mel grins and flicks her cigarette aside, blowing smoke into the air away from Michelle.]

Ah, gotcha. Good thing you're not on stage w'me then. We gotta dance in those fuckers.

[The grin becomes more of a warm smile.]

Which way y'headin', anyway? Maybe I c'd watch your back in case someone luckier wants a piece o' ya.

[Despite the evenly sarcastic tone and harsh language, she genuinely seems to care.]

[sixpetals]

That's really impressive!!

[Said with a fistpump.]

[But her frame stiffens almost imperceptibly at that offer.]

Oh no, I couldn't put you out like that! I'll be fine!!

[Besides, you might be one of those people. How does she know she can trust you, random friendly stranger?]

Thank you so much for offering, though!

[aint_that_peachy]

Not like I got anywh're else t'be, and you've a'r'dy seen your fair share o' trouble f'r the day, yeah?

[She starts patting her pockets in search of another cigarette. She finds none.]

Ah, fuckin' 'ell...

you surely saw this coming

[pyrotechnically]

[Congrats, Michelle, this is the guy you've just nearly castrated. He's clutching his crown jewels and writhing on the sidewalk in agony, but still somehow manages to get out a choked little laugh of his own.]

Jeez, girlie, I was just trying to help.

[Moans.]

LMFAO omg

[sixpetals]

[Yeah, help yourself to her wallet, maybe!! And if nobody else were around, she might have said so. But as it is, she has a doe-eyed defenseless little girl image to uphold, here. She gasps a little, hands coming up partway but not quite covering her mouth.]

Oh no, did I hurt you...? I-I'm sorry, it's just, you startled me.....

[Kicking people in the balls is a perfectly normal reflex action when startled, what are you talking about. She couldn't have been trying to maliciously harm you or anything, just look at her, she's so upset, her lip is wibbling at your suffering.]

[pyrotechnically]

[Uh yeah, no shit you hurt him. But Sly's just gonna laugh, because whether this girl is the picture of innocence she's pretending to be or not, he doesn't really care. She has a pretty decent right hook, and that's kind of hot. He struggles into a kneeling position.]

I was trying to give you your wallet back. You dropped it like, waaay back there.

[An utter lie, and not a very good one, but whatcha gonna do? If they're going to lie to each other, Sly will try to get away with as much as he can. He makes a vague gesture behind him, as if he's been dutifully following her for blocks trying to be a good Samaritan. (He has been following her for blocks, but definitely not for that reason.)]

Oh well. I'll live. No harm, no foul, right? Haha...ha...