[TEST] DRIVE IT LIKE YOU STOLE IT

[reapsthewind]

I HONESTLY COULDN'T THINK OF A GOOD PICTURE SO THANKS LAVVY

Here, have the slightly more relevant song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_nLlL1mwKI

Anyway, this is a random scenario test drive meem, since we've had an influx of new potential appers. I am a bit too lazy to make this a proper meem, so you make your own shit up. Here's some inspirational scenarios:

> The Mall. The hell are you doing out in the suburbs, bro? And why is that woman trying so hard to sell you nail polish?
> The Park. MAN IT IS A NICE D-- shit is that a Vermicelli or whatever the monsters are called?
> Arts & Crafts Fair. Cute knit cat cozies! Bad pretzels! YEAH.
> Rainy Day. It's wet and you're stuck at the bus stop. HOW DEGRADING.
> You get an echo while someone else is around. SHIT. PARANOIA TIME.

Or make up your own!

Comments

Vaati | The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap

[stealinghats]

[Victor is extremely short and feminine for a 20 year old guy. He is also an eccentric fashion designer with a penchant for the colour purple and anything long and flowy. Maybe you've seen his line??? Ahahaha just kidding, no one buys any of his shit. It's probably encrusted with cheap plastic jewellery, too.

He is also trying to sell you BIG HATS and LONG SWOOSHY SCARVES at the arts&crafts fair and will not take no for an answer.]

[puppetfetishist]

[swooshes into the arts and crafts fair]

Yo. You got a hat that matches this?

[he is wearing a neon pink sparkly princess dress and purple cape. and sunglasses.]

[stealinghats]

[He was just about to be excited about a potential customer, but then he sees that.

dramatically fake-gags.]

Ugh. If you want something to match, you should start by actually having consistency. [Your outfit makes him want to vomit, that shade of pink with that shade of purple???

And so he immediately starts rifling through one of the storage boxes in his stall (flicking his chiffon lavender scarf as he turns), because a fashion disaster only means more sale opportunities. Yes, he can fix this and make some cash, assuming his customer doesn't try to escape.]

The dress is... well, I suppose we can work with that. [he can't deny he likes the sparkles] But that cape is utterly drab, and you're going to need to accessorize. A look like that, you can't just go half way.

And why on god's green earth are you wearing sunglasses?

[puppetfetishist]

Medical condition.

[beat]

But you're right, blinged out shutter shades would be better.

Anyway help me out brosephine, I gotta accessorize and get this shit perfect. Like, Ru Paul had better tell me I'm a goddess here.

[stealinghats]

[Oh. Well, now he feels kinda bad. Clearly, this dude is 100% honest and legit, so there's no need to question his medical condition.] I suppose some substitutions could make them acceptable... Hmm.

[He throws Bro something half-cloak half-swooshy cape that is decidedly too pink to be legally safe. BUT IT MATCHES, THERE'S SOME MODERATE COLOUR CONTRAST AND IT MATCHES FLAWLESSLY. Let's ignore the fact that it matches something already pink and glittery and obnoxious that can in no way be redeemed on this figure.]

When I'm done with you, you'll be a golden goddess! Now, put on some of these! [SHOWERS WITH PLASTIC JEWELLERY it's actually pretty well made but it's still plastic jewellery, can't help that he's too poor for decent materials]

[puppetfetishist]

[oh hell yeah he puts on ALL That jewelry. ALL OF IT. YEAH.

Also swoosh dat cape yeah]

[vanisland]

[At this point, she doesn't really care, since somehow she got stuck in something that looks like a cosplay outfit and she has no idea what it's for.

So she's just looking at everything right now. No matter how high its swooshiness.]

[stealinghats]

[... Okay, even he has to stare at that. And he's practically in the business of ridiculous outfits.]

Pardon me, but is there a convention in town? [A convention he isn't selling at goddamnit he was trying to keep up with these things.]

[vanisland]

None that I know of.

[She only moved in like last week. How would she know?]